Monday, March 26, 2012
You are loved
Since today is the inaugural posting on Mom Advice Mondays I thought I'd share the #1 thing I want my kids to know every time they leave my house. I learned the power of this lesson when having a tough sit down with my poor oldest one.
I call him my poor oldest one for a couple of reasons. He is the oldest and I don't have a clue what I'm doing with him most of the time. And the poor kid is about 98% his dad (no that's not what's wrong) and only 2% me. The part that he got from me contains all my worst traits. Things that I've struggled to fix within myself and haven't be able to touch yet. So when we are having a disagreement it is like I'm arguing with that stubborn unteachable part of myself. Arguing with myself is taxing and I am much less patient than I could be. So take one doubly stubborn child and one mom totally devoid of patience and you usually end up with both parties in tears.
It was during one of these talking/crying sessions that I learn this very important lesson. At the time the oldest one was not able to see his worth and was in a downward spiral of "Nobody likes me. Everybody hates me. Guess I'll go eat worms." Having been in that place many times myself (see above re: bad traits) I wasn't sure how to help him feel better. The words that came to me were not my own though I have quoted them often since. I asked him this question, "Who loves you?" Of course in his fragile state his reply was "Nobody." Then I started to list all the people who loved him. He has a mom and dad, and grandparents, and aunts, uncles, cousins, friends. I listed them by name and said, "All of those people love you." When I got to the end of the list I added (again totally inspired) that he also has a Heavenly Father who loves him. Heavenly Father wants him to feel loved and He wants him to be happy.
Today's lesson is simply this - When you are feeling down in the dumps you need to remember how much you are loved. Even if you can't think of even one Earthly person who cares for you, know that Heavenly Father loves you. I believe feeling loved is the first step in discovering how absolutely wonderful and talented you are. Feeling loved gives you confidence and courage to face the unknown.
Do your kids know they are loved? Do you tell them often? Do you show them often? Do you know you are loved?
Of all the many things I am thankful for, knowing I am loved is one of the most powerful. Because I am loved I know that I can do hard things. Hopefully I've been able to carve into my children's hearts the knowledge that they too are loved.