The value of time

I don't think any mom out there would dispute that there is never enough time in the day (because even when you don't want it, sleep is neccessary) for you to do all the things you want to get done. For the portions of the day that are all mine, when the kids are in bed or at school, and I can decide what to do I'm pretty productive. There are no little hands or voices saying watch me, help me, can I, may I, show me. Or the dreaded he touched me, she's bugging me, or the like.

Sometimes when the kids wake up in the morning or come home from school (or let's face it sometimes they even dare to come inside the house when it is a beautiful day outside) I have a hard time switching gears from whatever I'm doing is the most important thing to being able to do the "run and jump." You know about the run and jump even if you don't realize you do. It is what makes you leave your hot dinner 15 times to grab an extra napkin, fill a cup, wipe a nose, or cut up someone's food. It is carrying a crying child out of a meeting you were enjoying. It is getting out of bed multiple times at night when all you really want to do is sleep.

Occasionally my husband will ask what I'd like for my birthday or Mother's day, usually I respond "I don't want to have to run and jump today." He tries his best, but with four kids we are outnumbered and even though they are becoming more independent they still need us to do things for them. And when I really think hard about it, I want them to know that no matter what I will drop everything to help them if they need it. 

That really hit home last spring. The twins hadn't yet started school, so I didn't yet have the ability to get things done while all the kids were gone. So even though some days I would have liked to take all day sitting on the floor and playing dress up and listening to songs I had lots of jobs that needed to get done and no child free time to do it in. This particular day I was really wrapped up in those jobs. While I was straightening the living room twin #1 asked me to listen to her song and I told her in a minute. Then I wiped down the kitchen table and swept the floor and twin #1 asked me to listen to her song and I told her in a minute. Then I was doing the dishes and twin #1 asked me to listen to her song and I told her I the big kids needed to be picked up from school in a few minutes and I still needed to finish the dishes so I would listen to her song later. She then turned around and cried, "Mom, you won't ever listen to my song." And my heart broke.

There are always jobs that need to be done, and lots of times I'm doing things I'd like to get done (like check my email and read the news) but I always want my kids to know that I'll take a few minutes and give them my undivided attention and listen to their song. Because time is limited, it is one of the most valuable things we have. Unlike money there is no way to make more time. Once it is gone, you can't get it back. As my kids age they'll need my attention differently. All of them can now use the bathroom alone, brush their teeth, make a sandwich, and much more. They need me differently than they did when they were 4, 2, and 0. But they still need my attention to tell me what happened in their day, or when they struggled, or to take just a minute in between jobs to sing me a new song. It is in those moments I realize just how valuable ever bit of time really is.