How to enjoy Christmas

Did you know that Christmas was next week? Well you probably did, but for some reason I thought that I had a whole other week with the kids out of school needing to be entertained. When I realized my error this morning it was in a mix of horror and relief. Relief that I only have a few days to entertain bored children, and horror that I only have a few more days to get everything done and cram in lots of Christmas magic before it's just boring old January.

In honor of the fact that I'm completely running out of time here are some quick bits of "advice" on how to enjoy your Christmas Holiday

1. Make sure you get all the sickness possible out of the way beforehand - ie have family members with bouts of stomach flu, various colds/coughs/runny noses, and a sinus infection all while forcing the sneezing, coughing (non feverish) children to attend various singing, dancing, and piano programs.

2. Injure a crucial part of your anatomy (not lungs/heart/etc) just enough that you are completely able to walk, shop, clean, or do dishes. You'll be able to more fully enjoy your holiday while sitting on the couch. You'll find joy from shopping from your seat (not your feet) and have lots of "free" time as you watch everyone else hustle and bustle around you.

3. Have a complete lack of patience with your kids. Make sure that while they are trying to be nice, you are able to nitpick everything they do to help them feel especially loved.

As you can see our holiday might not be off to the bestest of starts, which may be why I was hoping that we really did have an extra week before we got to the big day. It's been a tough couple of weeks here and we are still working are way to Christmas Magic. However it is always crazy at this time of year at our house. My desire to have a completely peaceful and quiet holiday is never going to happen. A few years ago I came to accept this and instead of longing for something that is unachievable, instead we make the best of what we have.

1. I always shop early for everybody. This isn't to brag but is how I cope. My goal is to have everything completely done by the twins birthday. That gives me a good two weeks to enjoy the holiday with a little less stress.

2. Take an hour (or two) and enjoy a movie. Elf and the 3 Santa Clause movies are some of our annual favorites. This year we've also picked up a couple of cute ones from various cable channels. It's a great break to enjoy a cuddle, a bit of popcorn, and a nice movie with a good message.

3. SIMPLIFY - This one seems impossible sometimes, but it is truly in all the small things that magic happens. Take time to build a snow man and sip hot cocoa. Listen to a story as you watch the twinkle lights on the tree. Drop the tradition that stresses you out. Worry a little less about disappointing other people and give yourself permission to enjoy the things that only happen this time of year.

AND even though you hear it over and over again. Remember the reason for the season. Spend a minute, an hour, a day, thinking about Christ. Say a prayer, read a scripture, sing a hymn, count your blessings. I have lots of favorite scriptures, but the one I find coming to my mind today is

Isaiah 9:6

For unto us a child is born, unto us a son is given: and the government shall be upon his shoulder: and his name shall be called Wonderful, Counsellor, The mighty God, The everlasting Father, The Prince of of Peace.

May your Christmas season be filled with the kind of peace that can only be obtained through Christ.

Happy Holidays!!!!!!!

Santa and a little bit of magic

 

I love the time of year between Thanksgiving and the beginning of the New Year. I love new sparkling snow and twinkling lights, and the buzz you feel most everywhere even while rushing around. I love the songs of hope, faith, love, and Christ. And that these songs are playing in all the stores as I pick up conditioner, and batteries, and a few presents. Even though it is crazy I love that we also get to celebrate each of my kids getting a little bit bigger.

 

Unfortunately at our house we are teetering on the verge of losing a little bit of the magic of Christmas this year. We don't have lots of "faith" in magical creatures here. We've never really had a visit from the Easter Bunny and since our tooth fairy is forgetful and frequently lacking in the change department #2 figured that one out all on her own. That leaves only one bit of childhood magic left: Santa.

 

My kids have never wondered much about Santa until this year. Oh we've talked about naughty and nice lists and have Teeny our Elf on the Shelf who visits. We've watched Rudolf, The Polar Express, Elf, and The Santa Clause movies. We've talked about how Santa has lots of kids to deliver toys to, and so he has a budget just like Mom and Dad. We've been asked numerous times if Mom and Dad believe. But this year our oldest has started to ask more pointed questions.

 

I think the hardest part about being a grown up is seeing all the magic of life start to disappear. I put on my smile, and do my very best to keep all my worries and fear hidden away from my kids, friends, and occasionally even my husband. I've come to realize that just as I must be careful what I eat and watch before bed due to my overactive imagination, I must also be careful what I let myself dwell on if I'm to keep it all together. Otherwise my irrational and illogical worry can spread into anxiety and even wide spread panic.

 

Right now the one thing that might just send me over the edge into full fledged panic is the thought that I might just finally have to explain that Santa is really Mom and Dad. The thing is even though I know who is putting the presents under the tree. And sometimes I've even purchased some of my gifts myself I still do believe in Santa. I believe that Christmas is magical. It brings neighbors together in celebrations of love and faith. I want my kids to believe in magic forever, to be able to see all the little miracles of life. I want my kids to always love making snow angels and catching snow flakes on their tongues and forever keep away the painful reality that life is not always unicorns and rainbows.

 

I know that I can't always keep them small or safe. I enjoy all the fun adventures we have had as they've gotten older and I'm looking forward to the many adventures are to come. But a big part of me wants them to hold onto a bit of the childhood magic for a little while longer. So for now, I'm going to continue to tell my kids that I believe in Santa. That he exists and brings joy to millions of children on Christmas day. I know they won't believe me for much longer. But for now I'm going to everything I can to keep every bit of magic alive.

 



 



10 things not to say to your kids . . . and why I hate advice like this

Today I'm going to get on my soap box for just a little bit. I've recently taken the plunge into the time suck that is Pinterest. Much like the whole of the Interwebz there is much that is good and some that isn't so great to be found there. While spelunking through various pins I came across a list of 10 Things Not to Say to Your Kids. It is advice like this that used to make me feel like a complete failure as a mother. I guess this list was better than some because it didn't use the word NEVER, and some of the advice is worthwhile. However I think that lists like these do not take into account the reality that is the every day life of a frazzled, desperate, tired, or exhausted mother.

 

So I'm going to take a little of a advice given and give you my take on it. The view from a mother that lives with four kids fairly close in age and who once had all four in diapers at the same time. Once who believes that her job includes not only helping create and motivate productive members of society, but also kids who grow up with a healthy dose of respect, honesty, and understanding that you don't always get what you want in life.

 

1. No (Fill in the blank) - The basic advice here is that kids hear "no" enough and that you should always turn a negative into a positive so "No running" turns into"Please walk." Good advice but not entirely realistic. At my house I've said "no" to lots of things I never thought I'd hear come out of my mouth (ie no climbing in the oven, no hitting your brother with your scriptures, and no running naked through the hallways). I totally believe in raising my kids with as much positivity as possible but the world they will grow up in also has a whole lot of no in it. The rules at the playground are posted as NO, not as please do this. I want my kids to learn from an early age there are certain things that are unacceptable always. These are the things that get a firm NO out of my mouth. I don't think this inherently damages my kids. Believing you can never say no without damaging the kids was damaging to my ability to parent. Expecially since my kids take anything accompanied with "please" as a suggestion and anything accompanied with "no" as a household rule.

 

2. Don't Argue with Me - I realize that it is a normal part of the development for children to question things. But in our house (and later in life) there are certain situations where arguing with your authority figure is not acceptable. I want my kids to know that your parent, teacher, neighbors, and other adults deserve respect just because they are grown ups. We address them in a certain way and yes we don't argue with adults as a way to show respect. When we are discussing options for dinner, what movie to watch, or what bedtime story to read, everyone is allowed to express their opinions. But when I say it's time for bed, to leave the park,or to stop fighting with each other the discussion is over. Obedience and respect are expected.

 

3. We are (whatever the child doesn't want to do that moment), okay? - This one again has some good info in the explanation, but as I've explained in previously, I'm going to tell my kids no and I also expect that they know what Mom says goes. I try to give the kids a warning for things that are upcoming, ie "Two more slides and we are going to go, okay?" Or "Ten more minutes on the Wii and it's bedtime, okay?" This gives them the chance to acknowledge they have time to finish what they are doing and still be obedient when asked.

 

The gist of my soapbox is this, every family is different. I've never found blanket lists of things I shouldn't do to be all that helpful, because my family dynamic is most likely different that the author's. I know myself and what I can and can't handle. I know my kids and what types of things they respond too. I hope that as I dish out advice here, you can take what you like and leave what you don't. And you never ever feel like my way is right and your way is wrong.