The curse of the 30 minute happily ever after

To anyone who knows my husband and I very well, it probably isn't a big surprise that we don't let our kids watch very much prime time TV.  This isn't to say that the adults in the house don't watch a little lot of TV.  The lack of prime time viewing is aided by the early bedtime required for mom's sanity when you have very early risers.  I also find a large amount of what is currently shown after 7pm inappropriate to show my kids (and no I'm not judging you if you let your kids watch). 

As the kids have gotten older we have wanted to branch out beyond cartoons, not that I don't love me some Phineas and Ferb, to show the kids that "grownup" shows featuring actual actors can be funny and entertaining too.  Thanks to live streaming via Netflix we've introduced them to the wonders of Short Circuit, The Never Ending Story, and their new favorite 1989's The Wizard starring Fred Savage.  Oh baby!  That's the good stuff.  This past Sunday I found The Cosby Show via Instant Play.  For many years of my growing up life this was a Thursday night staple at my house.  We had several of our favorite episodes recorded and watched them so many times I'm surprised the tapes still worked.  I was amazed as we showed the kids a few episodes how many of the lines I could still repeat.

In my effort to appease the different age groups with viewing choices this morning I found another of my tween staples, Full House.  In the episode Stephanie, the 8 year old, got into a pickle .  I think that was her main role on the show.  This time, her pickle was driving a car into the kitchen.  The kids all enjoyed the episode.  After watching we got ready for the day and headed out for our swimming lessons.  As we drove the kids repeated their favorite lines over and over and over again, I realized that as an adult, my perspective on the episode was completely different.  The 8 year old drove a car INTO THE HOUSE.  The kids are laughing and all I can think about is the paperwork, and increase in insurance premiums, how much is it really going to cost, and how long will there be a hole in the house?  AAAAAAHHHHHHH!  I might not remember quite right, but I'm pretty sure by the next week the family's problems were all left in the past and other than a clip show I don't think that the incident was ever mentioned again.

I know that isn't how real life works.  I've got a pretty great happily ever after life.  The guy I fell in love with is better than any flat romantic hero and my kids are of the fairly low maintenance variety.  But my heart still longs for those 30 minute happily ever afters.  Sometimes I dream that my pickles were easily vanquished and never spoken of again.  Then I wake up to the reality of my life.  A life filled with dishes, laundry, grocery shopping, bills to be paid, and a house that doesn't clean itself.  I begin to realize that life was never meant to be a sitcom, but a drama.  Because in the end, drama is what makes life interesting and worth living.  I just need to find a happy medium between managing the disappointment of no 30 minute solutions and worrying about the evil lawyer who works for vampires taking my house away.  Or maybe I just shouldn't watch quite so much TV.

I've struggled all week with what to write about.  I've started several topics but nothing was coming together, until today when I stood at the sink and loaded my dirty dishes into my newly working dishwasher. 

Our little family has been struggling for the past several years.  We haven't been struggling with anything big and as I've looked around I've always felt blessed.  My marriage is strong.  My kids are healthy.  I have a roof over my head, and a bed to sleep in.  I should be happy right?  Ninety five percent of the time, I'm able to push past the hard things and put on a happy face.  Rarely does this happy exterior not match my interior.  Over the past several months as we've prepared for what should be the easiest portion of our struggle (the part where you can see the light blazing at the end of the tunnel) everything seems to have fallen apart. 

None of the big things have changed.  My marriage is still strong.  The kids are still healthy.  We still have a lovely home and beds to sleep in.  But as the daily little things began to pile up I was having a harder and harder time keeping my positive outlook.  This past Sunday I went to church with the prayer to be able to see all my many blessings.  I knew that they were there.  I was just having a hard time counting them myself.  My prayer was answered in an iron and hair dryer, a visit with great extended family, a borrowed car, and in a change weather.  Finally the sun came out.  Not only was I able to see it from my front window but I could feel it warm my heart too.  As I type this, after weeks of doing dishes by hand, I can hear the swish of my newly repaired dishwasher.  It is music to my ears.  A testament of my loving Heavenly Father who truly wants me to be happy, even if I need a reminder to count my blessings every once in a while.